Ivanka Trump 2011



















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Let me begin by saying I was very impressed with Ivanka Trump, Donald Trump's daughter. She spoke at the Dan Kennedy/Bill Glazer Superconference and it was fascinating hearing her take on business. Here are a few nuggets I came away with:

1. You got to really want it. Ivanka is a driven woman. In fact, I would go so far to say she is succeeding despite her father and wealth. She works 3 times as hard as anyone else to prove that she is really is the best person for the job. And she has succeeded.

Now you could say it was easy for her. She has connections, a name, money. However, that's exactly the reason why it's difficult for her. People assume her success is due to her family and not her ability.

She could have thrown in the towel, turned into another Paris. Instead she decided to work 3 times as hard to prove to the world she is just as capable as her father at being successful at business.

My point here is that everyone has obstacles. Even if you can't see them, we all have issues and blocks and obstacles. And we can choose to give in to them or to succeed despite them.

And, we all feel the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. Ivanka truly believes her father would fire her if she screws up. (Actually he publically said that in an interview he'd fire his kids if they messed up.) Can you imagine the public embarrassment and humiliation if that actually happened? Sure we can all look at Ivanka and think "oh, she has it so easy." But if she ends up in the middle of a colossal failure, the world will all know about it and talk about it. That's not the case with someone less well known.

This is very common in business (well, in life in general) - people assume someone else's business is a piece of cake while they have to X, Y, Z to contend with. While it's true maybe that person doesn't have X, Y, Z, they do have A, B, C, which are just as difficult in their own way. So the best thing to do is rather than wasting energy on comparisons, focus on making what you have that much better.

2. What's going on with the economy is just a way to make businesses stronger. Okay, she's 28, which means she was an infant during the last big recession. However, she is learning from her father, who not only lived through that recession but nearly went bankrupt. How did her father handle it? He got up every day and did something about it. He didn't let the fact that he owed millions of dollars with no way to pay it back stop him. He got up every day and did something about it.

What are you doing right now? Are you sitting there waiting for the economy to "get better" so you can start making money? Or are you going to start doing something NOW to make that money?

Businesses are still making money right now. People are still buying products and services. You can make money, you just need to be smart about it.

3. Find what you love and do that. Ivanka had been offered a very prestigious job in another company after graduation, but wanted to work in the family business. Her father questioned that decision, which for a long time made her angry. However, he just wanted to make sure she was doing something she loved and not just getting a job in the family business because she thought it was expected of her.

What I liked about this story was what it said about both Donald and Ivanka. Ivanka knew she loved construction and buildings, so she designed her career around doing what she loved. Her father knew how important doing what you love is, and wanted to make sure Ivanka was following in his footsteps. Not his footsteps in the family business but that she truly was doing something she loved.

Are you doing what you love? Or are you doing what is "expected" of you? Think about it. Make sure you really are designing a business you love and that motivates and excites you.

Hey Kleinmann, Remember When You Pulled Me Aside After Class and Told Me I'm One Of The Smartest Dudes You've Ever Met and It Was Such a Crime For It To Go To Waste With My Laziness? HOW DOES MY ASS TASTE?!?!?!?!?!

For those of you keeping track at home, that's 51,732 page views this week as of 9:09 PM on a Monday night. Let me repeat that. This week as of Monday. It's only fucking Monday. Uuhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmm daddy likes that. Daddy likes that a shit ton. Let this be a lesson to all you younger cats and kittens who read this. Don't listen to your teachers. If you're smart like me then you're smart. Nobody can take it away from you. Grades are for the birds as far as I'm concerned. Let that little bitch get valedictorian or whatever the fuck it's called. She'll probably only turn it into a full ride to UConn or some overrated wannabe ivy league. I digress. This post is really just a middle finger to people. Like to every girl that I've ever had any form of relations with. One day you're lying to me and slamming ecstasy pills up your nose with satan aka james and the next you're reading this sentence here and hitting refresh 51,000 times to see my next post. Probably should have thought about that before you fucked with the heart of a blogging phenom. I know it was 4 months ago but I hold a grudge like a motherfucker. Start me at age 11 and I can tell you every person who has ever wronged me and I'll tell you exactly how I intend on getting them back. This blog is step 1.

New Rebecca Black! New Rebecca Black!



It's clear this is a fucking warning shot to all her haters. I mean she just blew the doors off of your living room and said, "listen up, this is my moment." She actually said, "This is my moment" like 34 times but whatever. I'm on board with this bitch. Nothing screams comeback like making a delusional music video that portrays you as a superstar in the studio and then practicing dance moves with a crew. It's like Teresa and Joe on Real Housewives of NJ. We all know about the bankruptcy and money troubles but they still walk around like their shit don't think, having picnics for dinner because they had to sell all their furniture. Just sad to watch. And it's totally OK if you're a dude and didn't understand one word of that reference. Not my fault you're not a pop culture savant like me.


P.S. the last scene where she steps out of the limo only to find about 6 photographers is gold. Rbeezy is ballin on a budget I guess.

I've Been Watching Billy Madison Clips Ever Since That Post Yesterday. Take a Trip Down Memory Lane With Me













In all honesty, I think that was the greatest post I've ever written. Wrote? It'sw wrote right? Written? Writed?

Is It Gay That This Is What My Desktop Looks Like?

I change my background to whatever season it is. It'll stay like this until we win the world series then it's on to Tom Terrific and he'll only lose his to spot to Rondo or the Garden after we win the Super Bowl. My only question for you is, is this gay? Like 2 dudes smiling and high fiving? I'd go with no and that I'm a great fan but I'm also a straight guy who watches real housewives, cuddles with my cat, cried at the series finale of Friday Night Lights and always roots for true love in long distance relationships so what do I know? Gay or nay?


P.S. I'd bet the existence of this blog that 200 people are going off about how much of a homo I am and how I'm full of myself and nobody really cares about what I have to say. That's why you read this bullshit everyday, right? Because it's garbage? OK. Good enough for me.

Nice Win, USA



What the fuck just happened? I'm more pissed off I just wasted 3 hours of my life watching that shit than I am about the women actually blowing that game out of their ass. No woulda, shoulda, couldas. Those bitches blew it. Pressure mounted up and they lost their fundamentals. Tried to play too safe. Safe soccer is dead soccer. Fact.

But give it to the Japs for never quitting. They kept coming and coming like waves of a tsunami. A really, really, big tsunami. And shaking the soccer world up like an earthquake. One that could kill thousands of people. Maybe even knock out a nuclear power plant. Oh that happened? Whoops.

This Slut Banged a 14 Year Old?

Clinton, Conn. - Clinton police have arrested a 19-year-old babysitter, accused of having sex with a 14-year-old boy she was hired to care for. Police said Loni Bouchard and the boy had a sexual relationship that was consensual and lasted half a year. Charges were brought against Bouchard after the boy's mother learned about the relationship. She was charged on Tuesday with second-degree sexual assault,  two counts of impairing the morals of a child, and permitting a minor to possess alcohol.

I blame the parents here. Why the fuck are you hiring a 19 year old babysitter to watch your 14 year old son? Why not call grandma up if you're so concerned about tommy hammerstix burning the house down? That's just playing with fire here. Would I fuck a 14 year old? No. Would I even fuck a 16 year old? No. But I'm also not bat shit crazy like this broad. I mean look at her eyes. I know the look and she's got the look and then some. The type of chick who would wreck any dude, even Togs. I bet she tried to blow the cop who took this photo. Sluts, man. Fucking sluts.

I Think I Want Ali Krieger More Than Alex Morgan


I get the feeling Alex Morgan is about to blow up which means she'll be blowing some tool like Zac Efron in 2 weeks. I can't stand when a chick gets all that attention and I like this Ali Krieger minx a little bit more I think. Not as stunning as Morgan but still cute and I'm pretty sure she's got some bombs hidden under that sports bra.


P.S. I see you Carli Lloyd. 

Most AntiClimactic Sporting Event Ever.

I like Darren Clarke. Seems like a good guy and all that shit but where was the drama? Where was the Sunday charge from the dude everyone is afraid of? Oh that's right. He was injured back home in Florida. It's clear golf blows dick without El Tigre. That's just a fact. Every week it's some bullshit feel good story. We need the bad boy that makes mothers lock their daughters up at night. The Media tried to cling onto sqeaky clean Rory after the US Open but he's revealed himself to be too much of a child still and Phil will froever be Phil. Always the bridesmaid never the bride. Maybe it's me but the British Open was boring to watch today. You knew Mickelson was done after he lost the lead on 10 or whatever and Dustin Johnson was finished before he even teed off today. Dude is a pussy. You say pressure situation and he starts running for the clubhouse. What's the point? I miss Tiger so much it hurts.









Ummmmm I Don't Get It

Long story, short: I'm running the blog game right now and I have no fucking clue why. Those fucks over at BJD can suck my right nut because they don't deserve to taste my left one. It's bonkers. I leave for a week, average about 1.5 posts a day, get into a bit of a blog squabble and my page views go up by like 1,700? I don't get it. And it's not like I was writing knockout posts that would blow your dick off and one was enough. Nope. Most of them were alcohol induced or just plain lazy. Not funny, not insightful, not hard hitting. It was all forced. Pretty much wrote like I was sitting on a 1 touchdown lead with 2:09 left on the clock. I don't understand it and I don't fucking appreciate it. Do people like me when I'm producing 8 foot long shitters? Should I just not try anymore? Makes you wonder. I'm losing my edge and inspiration while my readership is the highest it's ever been. Story of my life.



P.S. You're still making as much money off this thing as I am. That's the shit that keeps me up at night.

You're Trying Too Hard, Bro. You're Trying Too Hard.



Hey dickhead. Don't make fun of the little lady for not listening to Eye Of The Tiger before a game. This aint 1976. If baby girl wants to watch Wedding Crashers and The Hangover to get her blood flowing then that's all gravy in my eyes. It's actually kind of adorable.


P.S. her nickname is "baby horse"? Uhhhhh ok......

P.S.S. Abby Wambach is such a lesbian it's not even funny. Wouldn't be surprised if she starts scissoring with some broad tomorrow after the win.

Shots Fired?

I was passed it all to be honest with you. I was ready to call up benweezy and plan our marathon party. Swapping bitches left and right all night. but then this other kid wants to threaten me? And is it even a threat if he's saying someone else will give me the business? I don't think so. And from Eric Woodcox? REALLY? I guess I'm just confused and quite frankly I'm over it. 1,562 pageviews a day. I got bigger fish to fry.

I even tried to ease the tension with a little joke like bwill would crack me in the head with a bottle. I suppose having a sense of humor is a dying art form. 

Chicks Dig This Shit?

Oh wait. I think 60% of the commenters are dudes. So chicks and gay guys like that? Cool mirror profile picture, bro. Very, very, suave. Except the black belt on the navy blue pants. That's rookie bullshit. Navy and black is a no no. Almost as gross as black dress pants with brown shoes. Oh, it's gay that I know rules of fashion?


P.S. Not even gonna try to hide it. I'd beat the shit out of this kid if I ever saw him in public. I mean totally sucker punch his nose through the back of his skull. I only fight fair with real dudes and this clown is anything but that.

I Swear Me And This Kid Could Be Boys



Give me 5 beers, turn on Michael Jackson and just let me go to fucking work. Watch out for the leg kick, ladies. It'll get ya every time.

Won't Be a British Open Like This Until Tiger Returns



Say what you want about Tiger but this is still one of my favorite sports moment of all time. Real emotion.

ESPN.Com Readers and Commenters Are Pigs!

I Guess The War Is Just Beginning?




Uhhhh OK? I thought we were blogging bros? We were supposed to party in 3 days? I was supposed to be drowning in titties? What the fuck happened to that? Fuck him. Fuck him with an Aids dick. I simply can't trust this little rascal anymore. One day he's shining my crown in front of the masses and the next he's jerking off on it when I go to sleep. Well I've had enough. Noody spits on my name when I'm 8 states away and lives to tell about it. Consider the war back on.



P.S. I'm gonna end you. I'm gonna make it on my job to breakdown every half assed post you write. What a fucking fraud.

Michael Irvin Has The Gay

Former Dallas Cowboys great Michael Irvin appears shirtless on the cover of this month's gay men's magazine Out and discusses his passion for equality issues. Irvin publicly acknowledges that the impetus for taking a stand comes from his relationship with his gay brother, Vaughn, who died of stomach cancer in 2006. Irvin had not spoken publicly about his brother previously, according to the magazine. In the article, Irvin describes how his brother's sexual orientation contributed to his own issues. He says that he found out his brother was gay sometime in the 1970s, when he found Vaughn wearing women's clothing. Michael Irvin was rattled by the experience and has figured out since that it contributed to his own womanizing behavior. "And through it all we realized maybe some of the issues I've had with so many women, just bringing women around so everybody can see, maybe that's the residual of the fear I had that if my brother is wearing ladies' clothes, am I going to be doing that? Is it genetic?" Irvin said to Out. "I'm certainly not making excuses for my bad decisions. But I had to dive inside of me to find out why am I making these decisions, and that came up."

You had a gay brother but he's dead so he can't comment? Yeah Ok, bro.  That makes a lot of sense as to why you're posing shirtless on a homosexual magazine. I mean where's the logic in there? If his sister was a slut would that make it cool for him to do porn? Michael Irvin is suspect. Notice the way he talked about his bro being gay then immediately brought up his own womanizing behaviors so we'd know there was no way he likes to fuck dudes. Just desperate.


P.S. A lesson to the children out there. Gay people die.

Oh No! We're All Gonna Die!

Not the attack of the volleyball players! Anybody but them! I can't even imagine going toe to toe with a bunch of fake athletes. The horror!

Weezy Dancers Beating Up Nice Girls At P.F. Wangs

Fuck Off, Bro

Fuck off, you big legged brat. I don't need some asshole to tell me to hop on the bandwagon. I do what I want. I'm a man and this is America. I don't have a choice, you're my team. If I want to ignore you for 3 years and call you a gawky lesbo to only jump all over your ass when shit gets lively then that's my God given right.

IT'S HAPPENING.

Blah, blah, blah, some post about Pacman Jones. I don't care. When I said I was on vacation, I meant I was on vacation. I'm not paying any attention to the news or any bullshit like that.Yeah I know the Sox have won 6 straight and Gonzo is about to lose to Cano in the derby but I also know my tan is to die for right now. All I care about this week is beer, sun and the occasional blog reads and I need somebody to get me in contact with Wilson cause this fucking vag fest is going down as soon as I come home in 4 days. There's nothing like a group of 21 year old goons ganging up with some soon to be college freshman. Two generations colliding. Hold on to your dicks. "Oh pretty girl, you want a beer? Well I can do that for you with my legal ID." Togs busts that out 6 times a day at Lake Compounce. Fact. I'm exhausted. Fact. Exhausted is just another word for drunk. Fact.

I'm So Sick Of Derek Jeter Talk

I Got Way Too Involved In That Women's Soccer Game Yesterday

DRESDEN, Germany (AP) -- Running low on hope and almost out of time, the Americans were surely beat, about to make their earliest exit from the Women's World Cup. And then, with one of the most thrilling goals in U.S. history, they weren't.Showing a dramatic burst sure to captivate the folks back home, the Americans packed an entire World Cup's worth of theatrics into a 15-minute span by beating Brazil 5-3 on penalty kicks after a 2-2 tie Sunday night.Abby Wambach tied it with a magnificent, leaping header in the 122nd minute, and Hope Solo denied the Brazilians -- again -- in one of the most riveting games in the history of the World Cup, men's or women's."There is something special about this group. That energy, that vibe," Solo said. "Even in overtime, you felt something was going to happen."

I can't even use the excuse that I was drunk and the emotion took me over like when you hook up with a fat chick. I actually sat down on the couch with the sole purpose of checking the score while I ate lunch. That was it. Check the score, stare at myself in the mirror with satisfaction then go back to the beach. Little did I know I was about to be infected by the epidemic known as chick ass soccer. I mean these bitches can play. This isn't like WNBA or dyke college basketball where they pass around a smaller ball and play at a snails pace and the quality of sport is robbed from you. Soccer is soccer. The tempo might not be as fast as the men and it might not be as technical but it's intense as fuck. Like it got real, real fast yesterday and I have to say I'm hooked. Maybe it's the uber patriot in me but I can't wait to buttfuck France on Wednesday.


P.S. Alex Morgan's ass goes for days.

I May Be Drunk and On Vacation But This Is The Tits

First off, Ogling Ed Hochuli will always be better. No offense, but I've been in business since motherfuckers were in pampers. I'm real. But I love Bwill. I'd go fishing with the man any day of the week and twice on sunday. I mean that. I wanna hang with the kid and pound brews, plus his chick friends are quite of cute so that helps. What I'm saying is don't fuck with the kid. Yeah you can say my blog is better and blah, blah but that's common knowledge. I run this game. That aint new, baby. The point of this post I fucking hate anonymous comments. Fuck that. Grow a pair and if you're a chick then use your tits. I have no problem with people having an opinion and sticking to it but put your fucking name on it. Posting anonymous is so childish.



P.S. Weird I kind of wanna hate fuck Casey Anthony?

P.S.S. I'm in the outer banks so if I don't post everyday,  blow me.

Is This Real Life?

Having decided to play the tournament in the middle of summer in a country where temperatures regularly exceed 40C, Fifa have been wrestling with the problem of how the world's best players are going to cope with the conditions. Air conditioned, indoor stadiums will help, but even that might not be enough to keep them at a safe temperature according to Michael Beavon, a director of Arup Associates, the company responsible for developing the zero-carbon solar technology intended to cool them. As a result, one proposal being considered by Fifa is to play the 90 minute games over three 30-minute periods if the temperature inside the stadiums exceeds 30c because of the potential health risks involved. "There is a moderate risk of heat injury to the players between 24C-29C but if you go above that you have high and extreme risk of injury, " said Beavon, who was speaking to delegates at the Qatar Infrastructure Conference in London. "The one thing Fifa do say, although it is for guidance, is if it's 32C they will stop a match and play three 30-minute thirds rather than two 45-minute halves. 

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Qatar is hot? And so is the middle east? Uhhmmm This is news to me. I was under the impression that FIFA was a stand up organization that had the integrity and welfare of the game in their best interest. No way they'd let a country with the highest carbon dioxide emission's host a the world's biggest tournament. But apparently they're easily manipulated by the dollar sign and a couple commas. That's the only way it makes sense for the World Cup to be played in the fucking desert, right? Terrorists must have something to do with this. Or maybe Fifa is just corrupt as the rest of the Middle East. I don't know. What I do know is it's only like 90 degrees here and I can barely blog in this weather. Don't even remember the last time I wore sleeves. Can't imagine playing a 90 minute soccer game with no subs. Oh. Wait. I did that on Tuesday. Thanks a lot dickheads.

Free Puppy Alert! Free Puppy Alert!

Canton, Conn - A Canton woman who considers herself a friend of animals is in hot water for how she treated them. Police arrested 28-year-old Jessica Yazmer at her Collinsville apartment after discovering more than three dozen dogs and cats inside. Yazmer faces one charge of animal cruelty, and is in the hospital being evaluated. Meanwhile the pets she had with her are at a pair of boarding kennels in town. Neighbor Larry Lagace didn't call police, but someone else did, complaining about barking coming from one of the apartment next door, and that's not all. "You know the smell, sometimes it's terrible," Lagace said. Police found inside Yazmer's apartment about 30 dogs, cages with fecal matter, dehydrated younger and older dogs, some without enough food. Yazmer's Facebook page says she graduated from Simsbury High School, and went to the University of Connecticut majoring in animal science. "We're still looking into it. We don't know where she worked at, and I think it's more of a taking in dogs to care for, like a hoarding-type situation," said Canton Deputy Chief Donald Hull.

Somebody tell Brady we're moving his cat bed to the basement and times are gonna be tough for him for a little while. How awesome is this? These aren't some abused, one eyed bandit dogs we're talking about here. These are just a bunch of cute pups who fell into the hands of a crazy bitch with a hoarding problem. This is just fantastic. I seriously can't hold in my excitement as I'm typing this. You know how the best day of all time was when the pet shop opened it's doors for puppy petting hour? No? Well they did once and this fucking tops it. This tops the feeling I had the day after I lost my V-card. And that was a big day because I was getting handshakes left and right like I was Teddy fucking Schidel on Memorial Day.

Find Me That Bride!

Nothing drives a man wild quite like a hefty lefty coming out the bullpen and crushing bud heavys like it's her job.

Worst Name Drop of All Time Or Worst Name Drop Of All Time?

So Lucas Scott and TJ Lavin are boys? Or does he just want us to think he's cool enough to hang with him? Seems a little desperate to name drop like that. It'd be like Joe Biden not getting enough spotlight so he tweets something like, "Exausted from last night. Hung out with a real stand up dude. I think you'll like @BarackObama. Ever hear of him? I know I have!"

Did I Really Spend 1 Hour and 45 Minutes Watching This Movie Called "Going The Distance"

Big fan of Charlie Day, saw he was in the movie, it was on HBO and quickly DVR'd it for a boring day and a way to kill some time. No secret I'm a sucker for romantic comedies. Big mistake. Huge. Here's a little synopsis for your ass in the classic "Ogling Ed Hochuli Ruins a Movie for You Part 3." Two main characters are Justin Long and Drew Barrymore. I come from the movie camp of never making your storyline revolve around a clown like Justin Long, who used to play a dorky teenage at that show "Ed" and Drew Barrymore who's career should have been on life support by 2004. Maybe even retire after Never Been Kissed bombed. Chick is a nerd. No way she can be a love interest or leading lady in anyway. Did I mention she's ugly as shit? Anyway, movie starts off in NYC. Justin Long breaks up with his too hot for him girlfriend after he didn't buy her a bday gift and he goes to the bar to drown his sorrows while Drew Barrymore is getting shitted on by her boss at her newspaper internship so she also retreats to the watering hole for a drink. And now we're supposed to believe love happens by the two of them happening to compete on some pacman bullshit arcade game? Like it was meant to be because they're the two highest scores of all time on it? Blow me. You know how old Drew Barrymore is? 35. We're supposed to believe she could pull off a 20 something grad student? I'm not dumb, hollywood. Anyway, these two embark on a 6 week relationship before she has to return to college in California in the fall to finish school and they decide to keep the long distance relationship going. Talking on the phone everyday, ignoring the 3 hour time difference and all that. You know what else the movie ignores? Life over a 4 month period of not seeing each other. So Justin Long went home after work and just sat on his computer all day and night? Didn't talk to any girls? Didn't see any temptations out there? 4 months. Not 4 weeks. 4 fucking months. Let this all be a lesson to you fucks who think it'll be easy to keep your relationship going in college. It's not gonna happen. You'll break up by October. I'm not sure what time timeline is here but I think Justin Long goes out to visit Barrytits in November and they do their thing bu then they don't visit each other again until April. Oh whoops, Barrymore has always said she wants move back to NYC but the newspaper industry is in disarray. That's actually a big part of the storyline. She has a job offer from some San Francisco paper but that means she's gonna be living in Cali permanently. Justin Long flips a shit because Drew didn't tell him she interviewed at the Cali paper. I'm not sure if they break up here or what. There's a ton of resentment back and forth and childish yelling about why one of them is selfish for wanting to stay in their respective cities and yada, yada, yada. Anyway, they break up for sure. 6 months passes. Neither of them has fucked anyone or got into any type of relationship? Riiiight. Because that's how life goes. Barrymore gets a package one day with tickets from Long for a concert featuring one of the first bands they saw together. She's touched as fuck. Bout to cry and shit. Did I mention Justin Long works for a record label in NYC? Managing and searching for talent and all that gay stuff? I should've. That's kind of big too. So Drew Uglytits goes to the concert, totally thinking Justin Long is in NYC. WRONG! Justin Long is now the manager of this once little known band and he's permantly moved out LA! Yay! We all win! Except that LA is a 6 hour car ride from San Francisco or 1 hour by plane. But we're totally gonna ignore ticket fares and gas prices.

John Lackey Must Die.

The boos at Fenway Park were as loud as bass drums on the Esplanade yester day as Lackey was pulled in the third inning after giving up seven runs. That the Red Sox made the game interesting before losing, 9-7, could not obscure the growing problem with Lackey. It was the fourth time in 13 starts this season that Lackey (5-8) has allowed at least seven earned runs. Only Fausto Carmona of Cleveland can match that dubious achievement and he has made 18 starts. Among major league pitchers with at least 70 innings this season, Lackey has the highest earned run average by more than a run at 7.47. His ERA in seven starts at Fenway is 9.17. Lackey is 19-19 with a 5.16 ERA since signing a five-year, $82.5 million deal. The Sox are 21-25 in the games he has started, with yesterday marking his shortest outing with the team. “Just continue to work hard. I’ve made a lot of adjustments, kind of on the fly,’’ he said. “Some of those will hopefully turn into some results here soon. “I’ve felt a lot better since coming off the DL. I’ve pitched some good games and lost and obviously had some pretty rough ones.’ “Overall, my arm felt pretty good,’’ Lackey said. “Probably one of the better ones it’s felt as far as velocity and stuff like that. Just didn’t locate well enough. “I gave up some soft ones that fell in on some good pitches and had some bad pitches that got hit hard.’’


Fuck him. It's never John Lackey's fault. It's always a good pitch that a batter miraculously sent out of the yard on a terrific swing. He's such a fucking child it's not even funny. Take some responsibility and open your eyes, dickhead. You're not a good pitcher. 

This Will Put a Smile On Your Face



The sad thing here is that I act the exact same way as a 3 year old kid when I'm fishing. I love the whole idea of the activity. Sunshine, beers, water, and tons of man talk but I turn into a blubbering bitch when it comes to getting the fish off the hook.

Don't Be Shocked If This Is The Last Post For The Next 4 Days. This Is The Best Weekend Of The Year



I'm not sure but I think I made the blog mobile friendly? And now I guess I'm also able to send pictures from my phone straight to the blog? Look for a lot of updates featuring my drunk dick, my adorable cat when he naps, smashed beer bottles, lame fireworks, short shorts and hopefully some nip slips that the fairer sex is not aware of. Enjoy the holiday weekend, you asshole slamming queers. And if I don't see you, remember one thing. Keep your ear to grindstone or something like that.

Another Day, Another Lockout

NEW YORK -- The memories of a thrilling NBA season might have to last for a while. There's no telling when basketball will be back. The NBA locked out its players Friday when its collective bargaining agreement expired, becoming the second pro sports league shut down by labor strife. The labor deal ended at midnight after players and owners failed to reach a new contract. The two sides remained far apart on just about every major issue, from salaries to the salary cap, revenues to revenue sharing. The long-expected lockout puts the 2011-12 season in jeopardy and comes as the NFL is trying to end its own work stoppage that began in March.

Old Lady Dents a Car. What Else is New?

NEW CASTLE, Pa. (AP) - Pennsylvania police say an 89-year-old woman used her cane to dent the car of two people who stole her friend's purse, and authorities were able to track down the getaway car based in part on the cane's imprint. New Castle police Chief Thomas Sansone says the woman and her 82-year-old friend were accosted outside a pizza shop Sunday. Police say 27-year-old Jerry Brown Jr. grabbed the purse but couldn't peel away before the 89-year-old banged the car's trunk with her cane. Police found the car, and, based on the description of the robber - and dents matching the cane - arrested Brown and 21-year-old Tatiana Vargas.

I'm gonna say something that right now that totally goes against the moral of this story. I'm actually gonna ignore the entire story. I really don't like old people. I might even say old people piss me off.  I understand their old age might make them a bit prickly and pissy and that's OK because that's the cycle of life. But there's no reason for them to be walking around like their shit don't stink when in fact, their shit literally stinks as it leaks out their assholes and into their depend diapers. Yeah most old people are sweet little beings but I'd say 1 in 10 are a total piece of shit. Just mean, mean bastards. I mean the type to take the cane out and whack the shit out of your ankle or the type to give you a dirty look if you accidentally swipe shoulders with them in grocery store as if you were purposely trying to knock the old bitch over and crack her tailbone. Fuck you, hoe. If I wanted to break your hip, I'd roll this fucking Gatorade bottle down the aisle and kick your shit through your eyelids. I don't play games. I'm not trying to play grab ass with your brown stained wrinkles in Stop and Shop. I think the only peaceful way to respond to those hags is simple. "Hey, you're gonna die soon. Have a nice day...if you even last that long."

There's a Heavyweight Title Fight Tomorrow And Nobody Cares Except Me


 British WBA champion David Haye practices during a training session in Hamburg, northern Germany, Wednesday, June 29, 2011, for Saturday’s heavyweight title bout against WBO and IBF champion Wladimir Klitschko of the Ukraine. Klitschko, the IBF and WBO champion, is the favorite (55-3, 49 KOs), and at 6-foot-6, has a 3-inch height advantage. Klitschko weighed in Friday at 242 pounds, compared to 213 pounds for the 30-year-old Haye. Undefeated in seven years, the 35-year-old Ukrainian tends to wear down his opponents with his jab before hammering them with a right cross.

I don't really get why this hasn't gotten more play on the ESPN or whatever. Is it because it's two non American fighters who are fighting in Germany and the fight is for free on HBO so nobody really makes a profit by selling and buying ads? Probably but I don't give a shit. Like Joe Biden once said, "This is a big fucking deal." I know I'm supposed pledge my allegiance to my fellow Ukrainian blood but Klitschko can suck a dick. He's a pussy. And a dork. I tend to not like hanging out with guys who could be described as dorky with no balls. Plus he dated Hayden for like 6 months. I don't care if they dated 2 weeks ago or if they dated 10 years ago. The fact of the matter is she saw his penis and he saw both of her chesticles and that automatically makes me hate him and if I was big enough I'd kick his ass at center ice. So obviously I'm rooting for David Haye, right? No so fast. He's a bit of a pussy too. He's sort of like a Floyd Mayweather type. Great boxing record, some pretty solid hits but he's ducked the big hitters for years and seems to write checks with his mouth that his fists can't cash. Not exactly my type. In a perfect world, both fighters would bash each others brains in, give us a great fight and then fall into a coma and eventually die 4 weeks later when the families decide to pull a plug on both boxers.




P.S. The fight is tomorrow at 4:45 PM. How fucking awesome is that? If that doesn't scream day drinking then I don't know what does. I have HBO, fellas. Come on over. Except Jordon Brault. You piss me off, bro.

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