Skateboarding Added To P.E. Class. What's Next? Rugby? Frisbee? Oh Wait..

When Bill Ewe, a physical education teacher in suburban New Jersey, approached the principal at the middle school where he works about adding skateboarding to the curriculum, "he looked at me like I was a little crazy," Ewe said. But Ewe, a longtime skater who played college baseball, showed his bosses a news clip demonstrating how a skateboarding program had been successfully integrated into gym classes at a California high school. Soon district officials approved Ewe's proposal, and last spring students at Kingsway Middle School outside Philadelphia began pushing and kickflipping for credit. "The kids had a blast," Ewe said about a system that emphasizes balance, agility, coordination, self-esteem and perseverance over trying to become the next pro. "A 42-minute class period was gone like that."

And this is exactly why I never gave a fuck in gym class. Yeah, I said gym class. I don't need some physical education class to break up my breakfast. You'd have your typical JV kid or volleyball player trying to run shit in basketball and for what reason? To show you're better than me? Sorry, bro. I got a real game later on the varsity level that I need all my strengths for. Ya know, that real games people care about. Have your fun playing pocket pool in the minor leagues and look for my name in the paper tomorrow morning next to assists and tapping ass on friday night. But most of the time that class didn't even involve real sports. I mean Dave Keepin, bless his little heart but he'd come up with some mat ball bullshit and that was pretty much indoor kick ball but refused to recognize it as such. And if you're team was beating his? RULE CHANGE! Fuck that. He's lucky I didn't pop him in the balls every time I took the mound 'cause lord knows I could throw a heater wherever the fuck I choose. Didn't they come out with quidditch senior year too? You know Jordon Brault totally wet his pants when he heard about that. So whatever. Skateboard, rugby, frisbee. Add it to the list of games that were created to make all the non-athletes feel good about themselves.

P.S. If Life Of Ryan still on TV? Or did World of Jenks take away his time spot? You know MTV can't have two shoes that involve a monotone narrator.

Double P.S. Ronde Barber is still playing football. Crazy, right? I just read that in Sports Illustrated while taking a shit.